It's taken me a few days to come reply to this, in which time I've posted another update and you've left me another lovely comment, for which the only apology I can offer is that a) I am lame and b) sleep-deprived, so sorry :D
I always think that if you're going to go into a deep POV you need to use all of a character's senses, which is so interesting in a fandom like this where the characters have extra senses to contend with. It helps the reader feel like they're right in there with them so much more, so I'm glad the way I did the metal sense works for you! I once did a story where the first-person POV character was blind, that was really interesting to do. It was all sounds and smells and textures, and I've carried a little of that with me ever since.
I know what you mean about the disconnect, and you're quite right that it's deliberate. With Erik I always feel like he doesn't really understand his own feelings even as he interprets them, and hence the slight distance from them - they're not something he just feels, they're also something he has to think about and analyse, which makes them less utterly immediate though hopefully still of-the-moment. As well as lending an air of mystery to the proceedings :)
Re: Almost de-anon'd myself.
I always think that if you're going to go into a deep POV you need to use all of a character's senses, which is so interesting in a fandom like this where the characters have extra senses to contend with. It helps the reader feel like they're right in there with them so much more, so I'm glad the way I did the metal sense works for you! I once did a story where the first-person POV character was blind, that was really interesting to do. It was all sounds and smells and textures, and I've carried a little of that with me ever since.
I know what you mean about the disconnect, and you're quite right that it's deliberate. With Erik I always feel like he doesn't really understand his own feelings even as he interprets them, and hence the slight distance from them - they're not something he just feels, they're also something he has to think about and analyse, which makes them less utterly immediate though hopefully still of-the-moment. As well as lending an air of mystery to the proceedings :)