It would be so easy to say yes, to give him what he wants, to earn a smile that spreads across Charles’ mobile face, to light up those eyes and not worry about the consequences of agreeing, except that the only thing Erik fears more than failing the nation of people under his care is losing Charles, enough that sometimes he wakes up and has to lie about his dreams so that Charles won’t know how many times he’s seen those same eyes wide and staring and emptied of love, how many ways. Bullets, fire, sickness, accidents - or even just Charles choosing for once and for all to walk away, sick of Erik and his bullshit and his possessiveness, getting out somehow and vanishing, never letting Erik know if he’s alive or dead, just disappearing one day, as though he’d never been here at all.
. I am trying to muster up the courage that I Erik would need if that were to happen. I'd totally break along with him. In my opinion(and many others, I'd assume), Charles is everything to Erik. But deep within me, I feel that Erik isn't everything to Charles; no, I know that Erik isn't everything to Charles (being the captor that he is). It just breaks my heart a little to know that.
Charles craves freedom. Charles craves to live. He wants his work back, his life back, almost everything back to the way it was. And he deserves that. It was and still is his life to live.
But Erik craves Charles. Needs Charles like he had never needed anything in his life, needs him like a shadow needs light. And that kinda hurts.
I'm not belittling Charles' feelings for Erik. I understand that he feels constricted, and he is, forced into isolation as it is, but I do hope that he really does love Erik like he says he does, what with him being uncertain of his own feelings when he confessed back then. that part just screamed stockholm syndrome, but maybe i'm biased
I don't really know where my point lies in this rant, but I suspect that Erik is taking the brunt of the incoming hit he's going to be dealt with going to be hurt. A lot.
I read this fic's beginning again and I would assume that it lies somewhere in the future where Raven has passed. Charles is still trapped. And is a shell of what he was(he's somewhat closed off) and Erik's stubborn in not letting go.
Based on that, the future doesn't seem too bright for both of them. And that worries me.
Re: FILL: Everyday Love in Stockholm 161/?
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I am trying to muster up the courage that
IErik would need if that were to happen. I'd totally break along with him.In my opinion(and many others, I'd assume), Charles is everything to Erik. But deep within me, I feel that Erik isn't everything to Charles;
no, I know that Erik isn't everything to Charles (being the captor that he is).It just breaks my heart a little to know that.Charles craves freedom. Charles craves to live. He wants his work back, his life back, almost everything back to the way it was. And he deserves that. It was and still is his life to live.
But Erik craves Charles. Needs Charles like he had never needed anything in his life, needs him like a shadow needs light. And that kinda hurts.
I'm not belittling Charles' feelings for Erik. I understand that he feels constricted, and he is, forced into isolation as it is, but I do hope that he really does love Erik like he says he does, what with him being uncertain of his own feelings when he confessed back then.
that part just screamed stockholm syndrome, but maybe i'm biasedI don't really know where my point lies in this rant, but I suspect that Erik is
taking the brunt of the incoming hit he's going to be dealt withgoing to be hurt. A lot.I read this fic's beginning again and I would assume that it lies somewhere in the future where Raven has passed. Charles is still trapped. And is a shell of what he was(he's somewhat closed off) and Erik's stubborn in not letting go.
Based on that, the future doesn't seem too bright for both of them. And that worries me.