A/N: On to the final stretch. Not long now, just a few more parts to go!
------------------------------------------------
Erik’s breath left him in a gust as he finally leaned back in his chair, his story now finished. The ball was in Charles’s court now. There was nothing more that Erik could do, except perhaps apologise some more. Everything now rested on Charles’s response.
Steeling himself, Erik pulled his eyes away from the wall and glanced over to Charles in order to gauge his reaction.
Charles was in the same position that he had been when Erik had first started his story: sitting straight-backed in his chair, his head tilted forward with his attention solely on Erik, and the tips of his fingers pressed together in his lap. As Erik looked, he saw Charles lean back slightly in his chair and then bring his right leg up and cross it over his left one. His gaze was still on Erik.
Neither of them spoke as each surveyed the other, Charles in quiet contemplation and Erik in silent agitation. Eventually Charles gave a blink and seemed to emerge from his reverie.
‘I’ve listened to everything you have said,’ he began, and Erik felt himself tense in spite of himself. ‘And while there are parts – huge parts – that disgust me and – at times – even frighten me …’ Charles paused. ‘Well, let’s just say that I have given the matter a great deal of thought and despite the countless and deplorable atrocities that you have committed– That is to say, no matter which way I look at it, I … Erik, you must know that I can’t in good conscience bring myself to fully condemn you. Not after what I now know you to have gone through. Not after everything that has gone on between us. Not – not now that I know you so completely.’
Erik felt his breath catch. It was a moment before he could speak.
‘You – you forgive me?’ he asked, hardly able to believe his ears.
Charles grimaced at that.
‘I’m not sure that “forgive” is quite the right word,’ he said slowly. ‘After all, it is not me that you have wronged and we have known each other for too short a while for me to charge you with withholding information. But … yes, if you think it necessary. Yes, I forgive you.’
Erik felt his knees buckle. He was thankful to already be sitting down or otherwise he was certain that he would have fallen to his knees.
‘Charles,’ he breathed. ‘Charles you have no idea … I am so sorry to have ever made you feel so - Charles!’ he looked up at Charles with an expression of pain and yearning.
Charles hesitated for a moment, but in the end, could not resist Erik’s look of supplication.
‘Oh Erik,’ he said softly and slowly, ever so slowly, he reached out and tentatively ran his hands through Erik’s hair. Erik closed his eyes at the touch and bent his neck so that Charles could feel him better.
They stayed in that position for a while, Erik with his head bent and Charles stroking his hair gently, until the chiming from a clock in the next room roused them. Erik’s head immediately came up and he looked agitatedly at his watch.
‘The time!’ he said, getting to his feet and accidentally dislodging Charles’s arm. ‘Charles, we-’ he swallowed. ‘I have to go soon. Unless …’ he trailed off helplessly, looking Charles in the eye. An hour ago he would not have dared to hope that this would be possible but now – now that he had been forgiven … Swallowing, he looked Charles deep in the eyes.
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
Heat - Part 21a
Date: 2012-05-23 10:56 pm (UTC)------------------------------------------------
Erik’s breath left him in a gust as he finally leaned back in his chair, his story now finished. The ball was in Charles’s court now. There was nothing more that Erik could do, except perhaps apologise some more. Everything now rested on Charles’s response.
Steeling himself, Erik pulled his eyes away from the wall and glanced over to Charles in order to gauge his reaction.
Charles was in the same position that he had been when Erik had first started his story: sitting straight-backed in his chair, his head tilted forward with his attention solely on Erik, and the tips of his fingers pressed together in his lap. As Erik looked, he saw Charles lean back slightly in his chair and then bring his right leg up and cross it over his left one. His gaze was still on Erik.
Neither of them spoke as each surveyed the other, Charles in quiet contemplation and Erik in silent agitation. Eventually Charles gave a blink and seemed to emerge from his reverie.
‘I’ve listened to everything you have said,’ he began, and Erik felt himself tense in spite of himself. ‘And while there are parts – huge parts – that disgust me and – at times – even frighten me …’ Charles paused. ‘Well, let’s just say that I have given the matter a great deal of thought and despite the countless and deplorable atrocities that you have committed– That is to say, no matter which way I look at it, I … Erik, you must know that I can’t in good conscience bring myself to fully condemn you. Not after what I now know you to have gone through. Not after everything that has gone on between us. Not – not now that I know you so completely.’
Erik felt his breath catch. It was a moment before he could speak.
‘You – you forgive me?’ he asked, hardly able to believe his ears.
Charles grimaced at that.
‘I’m not sure that “forgive” is quite the right word,’ he said slowly. ‘After all, it is not me that you have wronged and we have known each other for too short a while for me to charge you with withholding information. But … yes, if you think it necessary. Yes, I forgive you.’
Erik felt his knees buckle. He was thankful to already be sitting down or otherwise he was certain that he would have fallen to his knees.
‘Charles,’ he breathed. ‘Charles you have no idea … I am so sorry to have ever made you feel so - Charles!’ he looked up at Charles with an expression of pain and yearning.
Charles hesitated for a moment, but in the end, could not resist Erik’s look of supplication.
‘Oh Erik,’ he said softly and slowly, ever so slowly, he reached out and tentatively ran his hands through Erik’s hair. Erik closed his eyes at the touch and bent his neck so that Charles could feel him better.
They stayed in that position for a while, Erik with his head bent and Charles stroking his hair gently, until the chiming from a clock in the next room roused them. Erik’s head immediately came up and he looked agitatedly at his watch.
‘The time!’ he said, getting to his feet and accidentally dislodging Charles’s arm. ‘Charles, we-’ he swallowed. ‘I have to go soon. Unless …’ he trailed off helplessly, looking Charles in the eye. An hour ago he would not have dared to hope that this would be possible but now – now that he had been forgiven … Swallowing, he looked Charles deep in the eyes.